In Memory of Speedy

You have to be a pet person to feel the sense of loss of a pet. Today Danielle's dwarf hamster, Speedy, passed away. It was Danielle's first pet that was hers, and that she was responsible for.

I told her about it this morning, she cried a little bit but then seemed OK for the rest of the day. I queried the X and she said Danielle had not been spending too much time with Speedy lately, another thing she has outgrown I guess. I remember how much she wanted her own pet and how many times she asked before the X agreed, and before we got Tails, I remember the ritual of bringing Speedy to my house whenever Danielle was going to be here. Kids grow up too fast.....

The X buried Speedy next to Chocolate, Scott's first Guinea Pig in her backyard. So, Speedy is in good company.

Enjoy that Great Big Exercise Wheel in the Sky Speedy!

"Speedy"
August 28, 2006 to May 18th, 2008

Those with the greatest awareness have the greatest nightmares.

I'm walking from the living room of the New Jersey house I grew up in towards the front hallway and stairs. Walking with me is my boss; she sounds like my boss but strangely does not look like her. She is talking excitedly about a new process they will implement at work. We walk down the stairs together but when I get to the door that exits to the front porch, her voice fades with an echo and I am alone.

I hear voices and commotion outside, so I open the door and the flashing lights of an ambulance greet me. Lying in front of me on two gurneys while the EMT's stand about doing nothing are my brother and my Uncle Sal. They are both dying.

My father, who is not sick or using an oxygen tank is slapping my uncle on the face repeatedly while sobbing "Don't die Sal, don't die!" Tears are rolling down his cheeks and I too begin crying. My brother weakly opens his eyes and calls my name; I gather him up and hug him fiercely. We are both sobbing and telling each other how much we love the other. I hear flatline tones from both monitors, and they are gone. I am stunned and....

I awaken with a start, badly shaken and arise early (for a non-work day) at 7AM; there could be no return to slumber after such an experience! Two hours and a shopping trip for the Sunday 'Cooking with Fire' ritual I have on my weekends with the kids later, I am somewhat more composed, but still shaken by this horrible dream which felt so very real.

Perhaps this post's title, a quote that I borrowed from Indian Philosopher Mahatma Gandhi, is true or perhaps I just have a lot on my mind. I certainly feel better than I did last night when I posted near the midnight hour. I hope Scott, whose sole dialog with me last evening was to request some soup and later a bowl of M&M's, is in a better frame of mind today. It is a bright sunny day and I like to believe such days are filled with promise!

Oh, another curious thing about this dream is that my Uncle Sal has been dead a number of years......

Note - Just as I was finishing this up the X called. Danielle's pet hamster Speedy passed away...I told Danielle who is upset....Speedy was her first pet. It's also overcast now. So much for the bright promise of the day...sigh!