Monday, August 18, 2008

Shocked on Sunday

Sunday the X, Danielle, Scott, and I went to dinner at Braun's. It's a decent steak place and I had my free 8 ounce sirloin sizzler coupon I obtained last September 7th on my birthday. Scott had a 18 ounce prime rib and Danielle and the X shared a ribs and chicken combo.

Afterwards we drove out near the lake to look at some used cars for Scott. To make a long story short we'll keep looking for now.

Later, the X and I were standing outside my house, and I was telling her how weird the weekends were since every weekend I wanted to call my dad. Yesterday was three weeks now since4 his passed away, and I still can't believe it, and the urge to pickup the phone and call him is very strong.

Suddenly a black car screeched up to the curb, and my dad got out. He walked over to me and said he did not like being dead so he came back. He gave me a hug and I sobbed uncontrollably telling him how much I loved him and apologizing for anything wrong I had done as kid.

I woke up at 1:30AM with a gasp, totally stunned. The dream was so real in it's clarity. The tie in with the real events of the day (dinner and car hunting) made it all the more believable!

I arose from bed shaken, quickly turned on some lights and adjourned to the living room where I put on the TV. There was no way I was going back to sleep quickly after that! I wanted to talk to someone about this, but, due to the late hour I did not. I'm glad the kids were not here so they did not get awakened.


Bev from PA said...

I am sorry you had no one to talk with at the time.

I had several dreams I found Mom living in a small apartment. She said she wasn't dead, just didn't want to burden us, and faked it. I was angry with her. It was a mix of when she moved out of our house to get away from Dad (without personal explanation to her children)and again leaving me when she died. I, too, despise realty of these dreams. I woke angry and missing her and what a mix that was.

Such an emotional time for you. I don't know what people did before TV to endure those wee hour struggles in the dark.

Hope you are doing relatively well.

Bev from PA said...

I can tell the kids are away. Hope you get this message before the weekend. Wouldn't want you ignoring us:)

Tails alright there, too?

Hugs & support, Bev