Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A Dream of a Love that Never Was

I had a very vivid dream last night about a woman I worked with back in New Jersey quite a few years ago. I first met her while providing IT support to the word processing department she worked in.

She was a lovely, personable, and intelligent young woman and over time we developed a nice friendship. Looking back at this I realized it was one of the most pleasant things I remember about my job at that period of my life. We talked about many things, including personal issues, and in time I developed quite a crush on her. Before I could pursue this I found out she was already in a relationship with someone at work, and, at the time that sort of thing was discouraged so that's why it was not obvious to me until I stumbled upon the knowledge of it.

So, since I would never intrude in an established relationship without mitigating circumstances, of which there were none, I did nothing but remain friends. I am certain she only thought of me as a good friend anyway, and not having similar feelings about me.

Over time, I was married, they were married, and they both left the company . After some e-mails we fell out of touch. It was one of those things that I used to think about "what might have happened? Could anything have happened?".

Anyway, I dreamed we met somewhere, and she was exactly as I renumbered. We sat and talked about this and that, laughing over old times, and then I poured my heart out to her, telling her how I truly felt about her, and that I did indeed love her all these years and never told her about it.

She gazed deeply into my eyes, put her hand on my cheek, and kissed me on the lips, and after this she whispered "I love you too, Chris Falco!" into my ear.

I awoke, very pleased by this, even if only in my dreams I had spoke to her of how I felt, and I was very happy all day today as the memory of this very vivid dream stayed with me.

It's funny, because until last night I had not thought about her in quite a long time, yet, all my memories of her and our friendship came flooding back to me this morning, and I was quite cheered by this.

Sadly since the divorce I've found, that outside my kids and a few close friends, I tend to be very narrowly focused on the present, often forgetting I have had some very good times in the past, and those times are to be cherished and the memories of them enjoyed. Perhaps it also means better days will be coming down the road as well.

Well, I see the hour is late, and I do have work in the morning. So, I will bid all of you good night, and hope that all your dreams will be happy ones.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Chris,

Perhaps the dream will continue this evening or at a later time. I sometimes have dreams that seem "unfinished" and continue the following evening or another evening.

Dreams are often a reflection of our subconscious.

- David